The USPS is my BFF
When you work at home, you learn v. quickly about the importance of mail.
Beginning at 2:45pm each day, I check our mailbox compulsively. I try not to scare the bejesus out of Tom, our letter carrier, by flinging open the front door with a neurotic gleam in my eye. Instead, I peek around the kitchen curtains like a psycho stalker, then race for the mailbox as soon as Tom heads next door.
It almost doesn't matter what's in the mail, unless there's not a single piece addressed to me. Obviously, funny handwritten notes are preferred, but I welcome bills, catalogs, and junk mail as well. Each piece is a connection to the outside world and a tangible reminder that my life is broader than diapers and Lego. Today's haul was v. nice, as it included the following:
--1 Netflix DVD (Normal)
--1 church directory from the Episcopal church where we were married
--1 invitation to an alumni dinner at Tufts, where I went to graduate school
--1 reminder from Tufts that I need to update my info in their database
--2 junk mail pieces from CitiCard
--6 catalogs, including 1 from Crate & Barrel
See what I mean? I heart the United States Postal Service. I want to give it half of a split necklace with the words BE FRI on its part and ST ENDS on mine. I want to weave it a friendship bracelet from my stash of rainbow-hued embroidery floss. I want to make us matching tie-dyed t-shirts that announce our unwavering friendship:
USPS + AJWP = FRIENDZ 4EVA!
Beginning at 2:45pm each day, I check our mailbox compulsively. I try not to scare the bejesus out of Tom, our letter carrier, by flinging open the front door with a neurotic gleam in my eye. Instead, I peek around the kitchen curtains like a psycho stalker, then race for the mailbox as soon as Tom heads next door.
It almost doesn't matter what's in the mail, unless there's not a single piece addressed to me. Obviously, funny handwritten notes are preferred, but I welcome bills, catalogs, and junk mail as well. Each piece is a connection to the outside world and a tangible reminder that my life is broader than diapers and Lego. Today's haul was v. nice, as it included the following:
--1 Netflix DVD (Normal)
--1 church directory from the Episcopal church where we were married
--1 invitation to an alumni dinner at Tufts, where I went to graduate school
--1 reminder from Tufts that I need to update my info in their database
--2 junk mail pieces from CitiCard
--6 catalogs, including 1 from Crate & Barrel
See what I mean? I heart the United States Postal Service. I want to give it half of a split necklace with the words BE FRI on its part and ST ENDS on mine. I want to weave it a friendship bracelet from my stash of rainbow-hued embroidery floss. I want to make us matching tie-dyed t-shirts that announce our unwavering friendship:
USPS + AJWP = FRIENDZ 4EVA!
posted by Clementine at 3:06 PM
2 Comments:
Sadly, the USPS is not my BFF by any stretch. In fact, they are on my "JPP hates you" list as they have lost multiple packages, including one full of DVDs that Heather sent us which just vanished (Hmmm... maybe someone at the post office wanted something to watch?)
Also, our mail carrier in Charlestown was a bi-otch who started writing nasty notes on our mail and threatening to stop delivering it when our lock was broken. Hello, there's no rule that you have to have a locking mailbox, psycho! Anyway, and as you have experienced, they randomly return my mail to sender from my current address claiming it was "undeliverable" when it is addressed exactly as it should be, and my name is clearly on the mailbox. Also, no.
Sorry, USPS, I hate you.
Poor Jane! I'd go ballistic if I had your letter carrier. I'd be on the postal service like a flea on a dog till s/he got fired.
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