National Coming Out Day
There are certain people I always remember on NCOD: my first girlfriend; the children's lit professor who called me out; my best friend; my family. Petunia too, of course. I give thanks every year for having such love and support in my life.
But I also think of the LGBT youth I had the privilege of knowing in my work as a crisis counselor: the whip-smart transgender woman who got herself off cocaine by reading Harry Potter; the young gay man raped by his father and brother after coming out to them; the trans and genderqueer youth who danced around the center fighting over Beyonce's part in "Say My Name"; the lesbian grad students who fell in love and eventually got married; the young gay man who died of AIDS several hours after my coworker and I visited him. All the homeless youth, unsafe or unwanted at home. All the suicidal youth. All the youth who used substances to escape. All the accidentally pregnant young lesbians and bisexual women. All the queer kids in group homes or psych units who visited the center on day passes. All the youth whose parents, families, religions, teachers, coaches, doctors, therapists, and friends told them they were sick, evil, or wrong.
On this particular NCOD, I'm also thinking of someone new: my daughter. My beloved Hester. My precious little girl who's being raised by two moms, who has no idea now that someday she'll be called to defend or deny her family. The very idea makes me want to scream and throw myself in her path to deflect the hate and ignorance she'll certainly encounter, but I can't walk this road for her. All I can do is help light her way.
Happy National Coming Out Day to my queer sisters and brothers, and Happy National Coming Out Day to our many allies. May we live each day with pride.
But I also think of the LGBT youth I had the privilege of knowing in my work as a crisis counselor: the whip-smart transgender woman who got herself off cocaine by reading Harry Potter; the young gay man raped by his father and brother after coming out to them; the trans and genderqueer youth who danced around the center fighting over Beyonce's part in "Say My Name"; the lesbian grad students who fell in love and eventually got married; the young gay man who died of AIDS several hours after my coworker and I visited him. All the homeless youth, unsafe or unwanted at home. All the suicidal youth. All the youth who used substances to escape. All the accidentally pregnant young lesbians and bisexual women. All the queer kids in group homes or psych units who visited the center on day passes. All the youth whose parents, families, religions, teachers, coaches, doctors, therapists, and friends told them they were sick, evil, or wrong.
On this particular NCOD, I'm also thinking of someone new: my daughter. My beloved Hester. My precious little girl who's being raised by two moms, who has no idea now that someday she'll be called to defend or deny her family. The very idea makes me want to scream and throw myself in her path to deflect the hate and ignorance she'll certainly encounter, but I can't walk this road for her. All I can do is help light her way.
*****
Happy National Coming Out Day to my queer sisters and brothers, and Happy National Coming Out Day to our many allies. May we live each day with pride.
posted by Clementine at 1:55 PM
3 Comments:
Beautiful post. Happy National Coming Out Day to you and your family! Reading some of your memories from when you were a crisis counselor was quite upsetting- the ignorance and hate possible because of whom someone loves is astonishing. The beauty is also quite touching though.
I feel the love between you and Petunia in all I see on your blog. I'm lucky to get a glimpse of that. I always appreciate seeing the love people share.
Btw, I'm so glad the baptism went well. It sounded very special- and the pics are lovely.
I think, when the time comes, she'll handle it beautifully!
Luckily for Hester, she is going to have all of us to support her too - plus you and Petunia!
It sucks that there are asshats in the world that have to try to make things hard (sometimes terribly so) for other people, but fortunately Hester will never have to doubt that she is loved and valued and that will make every challenge she has to face easier to handle.
I love you guys! Happy National Coming Out Day!
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